Usually when I post on my blog, I wait until I have processed through an event and come to some type of realization/reflection/awakening so that I can share something positive, perhaps even a motivator towards growth.
This post will be different.
It might be the most transparent post I've written.
Today my brother finally told my parent's that he is moving in with his girlfriend. I have been trying to convince him of the necessity of telling them for almost two months. I have been praying for their reception to this news and family harmony.
Perhaps I should have prayed for a specific timeframe.....
The news went over like a lead balloon. Even my Daddy, who is the most understanding and loving person I know, was quite upset at the news.
Their comments ranged from anger to disbelief and everything in between.
All of this is to be expected. My brother has not chosen to accept the faith of his upbringing. Thus, the moral compass he operates under is not the same as the one he was raised with. I can only imagine the turmoil and struggle this creates for a parent.
But I do not understand the judgment. As a Christian, parent or not, we have to be so very cautious we do not let the standards God calls us to be the same ones we expect non-believers to live their lives under.
This comment was actually said in refrence to my brother's girlfriend; "Well, I guess we know she is not a Christian."
I am wavering between anger, astonishment, and frustration.
We know someone is not a Christian because they move in with their boyfriend? Since when did our salvation become dependent upon our actions? Anyone who lives with their boyfriend, or anyone who has premarital sex can not also be a Christian?
This mentality of judgment is so prevalent among Christians today that sometimes I am amazed, utterly shocked, that someone who has not met Jesus yet would dare to walk through the doors of a church.
Oh Lord, forgive our judgment. Forgive us for forgetting, or failing to realize, the wretchedness of our own sin. Help us to see and love with your eyes and heart.
Help me to forgive the judgment of my parents.
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Judgment...
Posted by Ashlee Liddell at 11:13 PM
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2 comments:
Thanks for the transparency... We can always judge too harshly, it is harder to operate with grace. By the same token, we are to decipher from right and wrong and make sure we are following our "compass." Such a delicate balance...
ashlee...as one who has gone through this same type of situation in my family...remember right now it is all so very emotional. no, that does not excuse the comments and irrational "christian" thoughts that tend to surface in situations like this. i know you want (more than anyone) peace and harmony in your family as i know how much you love your brother as well as your parents. but, also, know that you can only do what you can do which is pray for all involved. ultimately, the changes and actions will have to come from your parents. your parents are wonderful people and i'm sure they are hurt and frustrated but hopefully, that will pass and they will choose to love mike for who he is and not because of his actions. my parents learned a long time ago that they can still love their children but not support their actions. i think, ultimately, that made a huge impact on my brother.
anyhoo, i feel like i'm rambling a bit. i just want to encourage you, friend. i know this is difficult but hopefully, with time your parents will "cool" down.
call me and we'll chat :) love you!
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